Advise by criminal psychologist Dr. Thomas Müller (who collaborated, among others, with the FBI)
“I have a personal opinion on this,” says Dr. Müller, “Discipline! The basis of this is to – before the situation arises – train constantly in a disciplined way, every day. So you don’t even get into this kind of situation. Because if you flare up, become emotional, when you react angrily in a meeting or business talk, then it is often too late.”
This means you work out a strategy in advance. Where you anticipate events beforehand – consider what could happen and, thereby, think ahead. And it has to be clear to you: This is a job-related conflict and not a personal conflict!”
Here I have to keep telling myself, very clearly: “I’m not that important!” And that, in no way, indicates that I am unimportant as a person. You can’t get neurotic about this. This is not what I am talking about.
But, and this you need to train in a disciplined way, and keep repeating: “My importance is not as high, as it perhaps seems to me personally. And what is happening around me is basically, and not always, about me.”
I can start this training right away. Now, in this very instant. Keep telling yourself clearly:
- This is not about me.
- I need to keep myself out of it.
- I am not so important – in this matter here.
The result: You create a DISTANCE between the DECISION to react impulsively and the ACTUAL TRIGGER.
This Technique is useful for The Incensed Anger Rascal character.
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